Blessing in disguise.........or disguised as a blessing?

It has been a rollercoaster of emotions since my husband got his transplant. In the beginning we both were happy and hopeful for the future. Afterwards there were ups and downs with his emotions (due to being on steroid based medication). The kidney was finally working full force and we figured the worst was over.......we made it! WRONG!

He rushed the doctors to send him home and was shocked to find out he would be attached to both a catheter and wound drainage tube. There were many nights of discomfort for him and I felt helpless. I wanted to help him but didn't know how other than trying to wait on him hand and foot and giving him sponge baths. I began sleeping in the living room because of his night terrors (probably mostly due to the pain medications) and the stench. The smell began to get stronger and overwhelmed me so I knew something had to be wrong. We later found out his wound was infected so he returned to the hospital for a few more days to have it treated.

I was relieved and he seemed content. NOW the worst is over. He arrived at home a few days later with a wound vac. This will be much better and a nurse will be visiting 3 times a week. This was what I percieved to be the perfect plan. Better care for him, less work for me, we both win. The nurse was nice and kept her appointments. He was told he would need the vac for 2 weeks.....well 2 weeks has turned into almost 7 and the smell is horrible. I am happy it is removing the bacteria from his body and believe this will be a small price to pay for his optimal health.

Something worth having takes a lot of work. I have learned this is not just a saying, but a fact of life. He now has his kidney and it's just a waiting game. I look forward to them freeing him from his vacuum pack and seeing the happiness in his eyes again. I can't wait for him to be able to take a Sunday stroll and watch the children playing at the park together. Most of all I look forward to being able to sleep in the same bed again...........together.

So no, I don't believe this is disguised as a blessing. It's a blessing in disguise that will make our bond stronger.

How much is too much?

My daughter is an avid artist. She averages at least 8 drawings and stories per day. I continue to find myself giving rave reviews and offering huge smiles with each picture she presents. The truth is that I am hiding a secret. Honestly, after so many drawings each and every day, I have grown weary and sometimes uninterested in yet another story. I am sure not to give any hint of that in my voice or expression though. I love that she has such an active and amazing imagination.

I was just pondering the question of "how much is too much"? With the first drawing/story I am genuinely interested but as the day creeps on and the drawings pile up, I find myself zoning out. There is only so much a mother can handle. Ah well, back to working (and listening to stories). :)

Just kicking back

Over the last few days I have been really tired (basically exhausted). I have been exercising daily for at least 30 minutes and I am still tired. I have also been taking vitamins daily (One a Day VitaCraves are delicious!) and feel a little more energy but still tired. The only thing that seems to help the most is taking a walk on a cool day in the sunshine. Today is no exception, I am now sitting on my chaise lounge half-watching court television. Yesterday was spent washing and folding 10 loads of laundry, moving the birdcage, working, and playing with my son.
I have decided to just give in and embrace the fatigue. It's probably only temporary and caused by hormonal imbalances so I am sure it will pass within a few days. My mother is always getting on me for trying to do too much but it feels like if I don't continue to do so then nothing would ever get done. It's official, I give up! (for today that is). Today is my relax, watch a movie, and work day. Oh, and I might make a cake LOL

Another day........NOT another dollar

Well, after putting in a few late hours last night, I was revved up and ready to go this morning. Unfortunately there was no work to be found. I was too eager to finish the last project so now I have a day or two until the next one. I usually end up doing housework and watching television during my mandatory time off. I often find myself searching for other work during this time as well. This time I plan to make the most of it by spending more time at the park with my little one and doing more housework while watching less television.

Right now I have already put the steaks into the oven and washed 2 loads of laundry. I like to earn my tv time and multi-task rather than become a couch potato. I am in love with these classic black & white movies (right now I am watching A Place In The Sun). Having too much idle time drives me to spend more money since I have more time to shop. I really hope I get more projects before I go broke!

Welcome! (........to me)

Wow! This is my first day really blogging. I am so behind the times. I have many blogs that I have started on social sites as well as other blogging venues but never seem to find the time. I have since learned that blogging is an excellent outlet for emotions and frustrations as well as simply looking back on certain days.

Well, today feels like a fresh start for me! I just accepted delivery of my first complete living room set. I am blessed with a sofa, love seat, and chaise lounge. It feels like heaven! I can actually look at my living room and feel joy within my heart instead of disdain. Working from home makes it very hard to love your living area since it is also your place of work. I now know that a simple change of decor can make a big difference in your attitude and give a motivational boost. I now look forward to being able to lounge on my chaise while working on my laptop into the wee hours of the morning.

This feels like the best day I have had this year.